Dust in the Wind

Sometimes I wonder if something ever happened to me, would I leave anything behind worth remembering? Have I made a big enough impact on the people I've met that years down the road they'll still be talking about me, or will everything I am & everything I'm done be forgotten & washed up? I don't want to be forgotten. I want to leave my mark on the world, just so that I know where to go back to if I ever lose myself. I'm not going to sit & watch as all the memories of me turn to dust & ash & blow away in the storm. No, I'm staying right where I am thank you.



I don't really know what I'd like to leave behind... my photography? My writing? The things I write aren't enough to change one person, let alone the world. And my photography? It's not inspiring, it's not unique, it's just higher contrast pictures on a computer screen. None of them have even been developed. How tragic is that? I don't know what I could possibly offer this world that it doesn't already have more than enough of. I'm not somebody that leaves much of an impact when I first meet somebody, & although I've given some old friends some good memories & I've changed the way a lot of people live their lives, it hasn't always been in the best way. I just want something to offer that matters. That would be memorable...

Maybe I'm asking too much. Maybe I should just stick with what I do best & keep it to myself... but maybe that would be selfish? God, I don't know what to do. I feel unappreciated, worthless, & I'm always worried that I'm just going to fall into the typical cookie cutter mold everyone else is in. I KNOW I'm meant for something more than this. I just don't know what yet.